A cliche
2010-07-10 @ 17:26:04
I'm aware I'm not being original when I say that I'm freaking fond of cooking for my man..but that's the way things are ;)
I've never thought of myself as being keen on getting down to things I've no idea how to do/manage, but I guess I am.. I mean I didn't know how to play that special instrument but I learned..just by listening to my fave songs and by trying to play with the drummers. Later I discovered utube and it has been much easier ever since. But - whenever I'm trying to learn a new song - I wait quite a long time before I go online (if ever) to see how it's played. I still like learning on my own, and only if I have some problems, do I google the song :)
And it was the same with writing my very own www.. I had no idea about the HTML language but it took me 3 or 4 days to learn..And another 1 hour to learn about the ins and outs of CSS.. I know I know..at the very moment CSS is considered to be obsolete but who cares? I like it so I use it, simple as that ;)
And the cooking thing.. start with easy things and move on to more complicated. I remember when I was younger my mother would cook fancy stuff and I thought I would never be able to do the same things coz it was sooooo complicated. It wasn't. It isn't.
Having cooked a number of dishes I had always thought of as being difficult, I believed in myself. Nowadays, there's not a thing I will not try to cook :) And not that I'm blowing my own trumpet, but I'm pretty good...oh, all right, I'm great at preparing meals :) Ask my man ;)
I enjoy cooking for Him..I really do.. There's this joy in my heart when I've served Him a dish, and after a few bites He turns to me and with a smile on His face announces that it's delicious.. ;) That's why I keep trying out new recipes and note down whatever we both take liking to to cook it some other time. Cooking is fun. Eating it is greater fun ;)
Unfortunately, I can't say I'm into cleaning.. I do it coz I have to..I do it because if I don't do it, it will not be clean as it should be..which will make me frustrated and I'm terrible when I'm irked..Again, ask my man :)
OK, enough of loafing about..it's high time I got down to tidying up this mess......
Lasagna
2010-07-09 @ 15:20:42
OK, so this is my last time trying to make lasagna. This time I ‘ve bought cake tins..hopefully this will prevent the sauces and lasagna noodles from falling apart..I’ve already done everything and lasagna is baking..no smells yet..we’ll see what has come out of it ;)

update
It was delicious!
17-18
2010-07-08 @ 10:46:33
animosity towards - strong dislike, opposition, or anger
bear no animosity against
amount to - to become a particular amount
accord with - to be the same as something, or to agree with something
be totally abashed by/at - embarrassed
barter for/with - to exchange goods for other things rather than for money wymienić, przehandlować
make a beeline of - to go directly and quickly towards ruszyć prosto w kierunku czegoś
bask in - to lie or sit enjoying the warmth especially of the sun wygrzewać się, pławić się
whet the appetite - to increase someone's interest in and wish for something, usually by giving them a small experience of it zaostrzyć apetyt
averse to -ing - strongly disliking or opposed to przeciwny
make allowances for - to prepare for the possibility of wziąć pod uwagę coś, wziąć poprawkę na coś [growth, inflation, variation
#
boast about/of
have an aversion to
ban on
she couldn't account for the sand
the apple of sb's eye

***
I believe I’ll start bearing animosity towards the health service in this country. That is, I will if I haven’t already started..
Yesterday I set off at 7 am..first the appointment at my GP..waited 50 minutes..my visit was delayed by 50 bloody minutes! But yeah, that was to be expected. At least the doc was a good one..he gave me 5 orders to 5 different places..then I went to the hospital...it took me 10 minutes to find the right person to tell me what I should do and where I should go, because of course the woman who was supposed to be sitting in this cubbyhole with a big Information sign was out and about (probably smoking) and of course it had not occurred to her to put up a sign with information that she would be back in 5 minutes or so..of course not, why bother, huh? Anyway, then it took some listening to a receptionist complaining about my GP (how irresponsible he was, how rude he was, how irritated she was because he had sent me to the hospital without giving me the order..blah blah blah) but I did have to hear my share of it all before I was kindly registered with a surgeon. And then I had to wait for 2 hours and 13 minutes to be seen by him and it took him not longer than 1 minute to examine me..How lovely..And then I got an X-ray order so I went where I had been instructed to go. A woman at the reception directed me to another place because, apparently, there had been 2 more urgent cases. Not until I finished talking to her did I behold 3 people who had been examined by the very same surgeon (after me) and who came in with the same order. And they were told the same thing. And then they made a beeline to be the first to be X-rayed. I mean wtf?!
The guy at the X-ray facility was..seemed to be a several cards short of a full deck, to say the least..He did behave like a nutter..but in a sweet, harmless way ;) I was told to pick up the X-rays the following day.
So I did.
I got up today at 6.30, got ready and went to the facility. Took the X-rays and went to make an appointment with the surgeon so that he can have a look at them and tell me whether I should start to worry. I was told by the receptionist that I ought to make an appointment with my GP first to get his order to make an appointment with the surgeon ;| And she dared be indignant that I had not known that.. So I came back home empty-handed. Well, not really – I do have the X-rays but it will take another few days and many hours spent either at the reception desks or in waiting rooms queuing for a meeting which will last shorter than 5 minutes. Oh, how I love this country...
So?
2010-07-06 @ 19:03:13
There's a bloody reason for everything, right? The suffering, the fear, the misery, the dying hope, the hopelessness and so on and so forth. You gotta accept things the way they are coz there's a plan..a bigger one, and it should not - under any circumstances - be changed. This..state..sometimes takes the busciut. I keep standing, staring..feeling this..this inability to act coz whatever I do, it comes to grief..I'd pray occasionally if there was anything to pray to. There isn't. Every now and then it does feel like there's nothing there..no grounds to move on..no will whatsoever..You're stuck in this nothingness..this numbness..this..words've failed me. It's ludicrous in a sense..in a weird, eldritch way..
***
Off and on I feel like I'm left-field, atypical, strange and off-the-wall. And maybe not dead inside but definitely unable to sympathise no matter the situation. It scares me that I don't care..about this particular species, I hasten to add. For most of the time, what I do and what I really think are two completely different issues. It's living in this society, having that kind of mates and not others that make me do things I wouldn't otherwise do. I wonder why I'm this way.. the drunk who was my father? LaVey? My very own observations and conclusions concerning the world and people? My so fucked-up relationship with my mother? It's snafu. Or maybe none of that matters. Maybe I was born this way..Maybe that's who I am supposed to be. Maybe that makes me - if not different - then not like others. I guess I don't care way too much to care.
15 - 16 continued
2010-07-01 @ 11:50:12
Man, this weather has been bearing on me so much and it's only been a few days. Loathe scorching days like today.. Especially that I have to go to the city centre ;/ I'm grumpy today ;/
As if the sun alone was not enough, there are going to be hundreds of people in the centre..running errands..shopping..loitering..crawling like worms on the sidewalks after the rain..Not fond of crowds, that much I can tell :|

Ah, but the day's expected to turn out better than it started on account of the books I'm looking to :)
15-16
2010-07-01 @ 01:20:22
be in with - be in favour with
be beneath sb - be demeaning
be in for it - be about to receive punishment/trouble
be off - (1) cease to want or to be interested in sth (2) be bad/unhealthy [food]
be out - [flowers] be in bloom
have bearing on - have an influence
bear on - be relevant to/affect
act on - do whatever is advised/suggested
act up inf - behave awkwardly or badly/ not work properly
bear with - be patient
all in inf - exhausted
all told - altogether
for all - in spite of
all the same - yet, however
for all I care - I don't care
on account of - because of
on this/that account - for this/that reason
*in the air - it exists, but not talked about
*up in the air - uncertain
clear the air - remove suspicion or bad feeling
be up in arms - be very angry
on the alert - on the look-out; expecting sth

* a mistake might have been made, I dare say it's the other way around than this:
in the air - uncertain
up in the air - it exists, but not talked about
{ That does seem like an exacting task but I shall try ;) }

First of all, it has started again..For the last couple of days I've been feeling it..well, feeling there was something in the air..but couldn't quite nail that one..It got more intense an hour ago..the only good thing to come out of it is that the air has been cleared..Now that I know what it is, it's a lot easier to fight.. I wonder how long this will last..this will definitely bear on me in the bad way..damn! Like I haven't got more important things to deal with ;//
On a more personal note (can this get more personal than that one?):
Tomorrow..well, later today, I'm meeting my boss to discuss stuff..She'd love to put me in the position where I would be in for it so that she could shout at me and be oh-you-disrespected-my-friend-so-I-am-going-to-show-you-your-place-coz-I'm-the-freaking-manager-and-I-can and all that. She would if she could.. I don't act up. I love my job, 'my people' are in with me which definitely makes her and that little bitch up in arms. They can fuck off, for all I care ;) No, I do not like my boss. I think she's a little two-faced cunt..But, all told she's a good boss..in terms of managing the business..
Anyhow..
Crap! It is irritating me..my skin..my thoughts..I'm going to be all in before it's over..gotta prepare for the annoyance up in the air..It's going to be a couple of hard days..hope He will bear with me coz I'm going to be unbearable on account of those damned creatures ;/ It's ridiculous that something so tiny so seemingly irrelevant can and does have bearing on me..on my relationship..my behaviour ;/ I've no idea how this could happen again..I feel like puking when I think of what I have to do to get rid of it Gonna be hard few days Crap.Crap.Crap!
{no more ideas..nor willingness..nor strength..}
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